1 Thing That Will Improve Your Life
2022 is rolling along, and many of us are slogging through our first week of New Years’ Resolutions. I used to scoff at such lists because resolve tends to crumble sometime in February, usually in a deluge of Valentines’ chocolate. Also, as a borderline fitness freak, I feel change is possible any random day of the year, so why the big fuss about slicing the cellophane on a new calendar? I know, a new year feels like a new start, but honestly, I’m still the same person I was on the 31st of December. The change of a calendar doesn’t magically erase who I was yesterday.
I tend to be a challenge-a-holic. Rules and regulations, such as run 5 miles on Monday, 6 on Tuesday, give me concrete guidelines into which I can wedge my chaotic self. I will cling to a challenge through pain and deprivation in order to “win,” whether it’s not drinking alcohol for three months, running 26.2 miles, or being a gluten-free vegan for a year. But the fact is, after I have a medal hanging around my neck, or buy the next size smaller spandex tights, my unmotivated self trickles back into reality. Next thing I know, I’m binging Netflix and munching salt & vinegar kettle chips in bed. Eventually, fed up with myself, I find a new personal challenge.
There are definite benefits to challenges. They can help you break bad habits or give you a new perspective. Saying ‘no’ to the Merlot for three months completely changed how I drink. I went from a daily glass of wine (let’s be real, it was a generous, half-bottle-sized glass) to now drinking one glass rarely and always in the company of other people. A physical challenge, in particular, can build mental endurance that seeps into other areas. At one time in my life, running marathons helped me cope with extreme and unusual stress. Basically, a physical challenge is your body showing your mind that you can do shit that’s hard.
However, as my clock ticks closer to fifty, I’m pursuing goals in a more balanced way, and I’ve discovered the one thing I can do to change my life, to accomplish my dreams, to live a life that is fulfilling and overall happy.
What is that one thing?
to do one thing
Simple, right?
Let’s say you wrote out your list for the new year. Maybe you want to build muscle or to be able to climb stairs without the heart rate of a rabbit. So your goal is to get to the gym three times a week. If you’ve never darkened the door of a gym, to go three times could be a big plunge for you. Instead of diving off the deep end, enter by the shallows. Dip in your foot and adjust to the water before going under.
Do one thing.
One specific thing.
One thing you don’t hate.
In this case, you could say, “Okay, I’ll go to the gym Tuesdays after work.”
Then do it.
Do it until you don’t even think about not doing it.
Do it until you’re scheduling other things around it.
Do it until you go even if you don’t “feel” like it, but you mysteriously find yourself there anyway.
Do this one thing until it’s as automatic as breathing.
Or maybe you want to write a novel? So, look at that fresh new calendar and find thirty minutes on Thursday to sit at your keyboard. Even if you stare at a blank screen or just type your name at the top, at least you’ve begun.
Whether it takes weeks or years, this “one thing” will become part of who you are now.
And then?
Do one more thing.
Add another day to your gym calendar or writing schedule. Run a little farther. Swap the soda-pop for H2O. Eat all your veggies. Practice a new skill.
Whatever it is, do that one thing.
And repeat the process.
Does doing this one thing take longer?
Absolutely!
Resolutions should not be about how long you can survive on nothing but cabbage soup; a resolution should be about integrating healthy habits into your life for the long run.
We often see these dynamic coaches, doing all the things we want to do and being the kind of person we think we want to be. Even if we see the “before” photo, what we’re really looking at is the “after,” which likely took years of sweat and dedication to accomplish. As much as we want to, we can’t jump from zero to light-speed. Unless there is an addiction which requires complete abstinence, the “one thing” rule can give balance and guidance to people teetering on the edges of lives they want.
Lasting change isn’t likely to happen with all-or-nothing approach. While doing one thing certainly isn’t “all;” it isn’t nothing either. Over time, doing just one thing adds to your overall lasting-change meter. Your one small change will pave the way for another change and another. Before you know it, you’ll find you need to buy smaller pants or use heavier weights. Your friends may be disappointed you no longer keep beer in the fridge, but you will have met that goal you scratched in your journal one new year long ago.
While a challenge can jumpstart healthy habits, there is nothing wrong with starting with just one thing. For people with depression or burnout, lists can be daunting or outright hateful. It’s better to accomplish one goal you feel good about than pin up a list of fifty reasons to feel like a ‘failure.’
A list of ways to improve your life can seem impossible when you can barely get out of bed in the morning. Resolutions glare at you saying, “You’re such a screw-up! You can’t even do these things?” Don’t get caught in that swirling cesspool of negativity. Just do one thing consistently — and be proud.
You might wonder: “Am I to celebrate something small, like showering? Or cleaning the kitchen before bed?” Hell, yes! Celebrate that one thing! It’s not about how ‘big’ or ‘small’ the task was; it’s about the dedication and investment of your time. When that one thing becomes habitual, add another thing — and celebrate it too! Be as kind to yourself as you would to your friends.
So, make your bed, drink three liters of water a day, park in the back lot, go to the gym —but not necessarily all at once. You don’t cobble a walkway by kicking over a pile of bricks in the yard. You place them one-by-one, so they connect in a logical pattern and clear direction. Though a single brick might feel rough in your hand, it’s not unmanageable. Eventually, those blocks create a path that leads exactly where you want it to go.
When people admire your handiwork and ask, “How did you do that?”
You’ll gaze wistfully back and answer, “Well, I decided to do one thing.”
